Locust of Death!

El Bigote Pinups...

2012-01-09T21:31:00.000-08:00

'Tonight I played cards with a disgraced priest. We wagered confessions...'

Artist Stewart Davies drew the above pinup of El Bigote's skull-faced nemesis. It'll appear in the A Tequila-Drenched Reckoning collection, and will be the cover of a future collection...

'I got hellfires a'burnin' inside me. Hellfires thet scorch flesh an' char bones. Hellfires thet blacken souls...'

2000AD art droid Grant Perkins - of whose absolutely bonkers style I'm a big big fan - drew the above pinup of Undead Quillslinger El Bigote and his faithful Ostrich. It'll appear in the A Tequila-Drenched Reckoning collection, and is set to be the cover of issue 4. Be sure to visit Mr. Perkin's website...here!

For more information about El Bigote, get yer tail on over to El Blogote.

Travel Waaaaaay Down South of the Border with El Bigote...

2011-12-30T01:37:00.000-08:00

Take a trip South of the Border, the border between Life and the Afterlife, and visit Undead Mexico, where El Dia De Los Muertos never ends…

Living dead banditos and ghoulish conquistadores, cannibalistic muertoads and spectral sessquatches prowl Mexico’s haunted prairies – and it’s up to Undead Mexican Mustache-Quillslinger El Bigote to put them back in their tequila worm-infested graves!

Writer Locust (that's me, but I'm trying to make this sound like an official press release), artist El Chivo and letterer Bolt 01 are set to uncork El Bigote: A Tequila-Drenched Reckoning on unsuspecting comic book readers.

A Tequila-Drenched Reckoning is a special stand-alone series preview issue aimed to introduce readers to and showcase the bizarre world of El Bigote, which just might be the only Gothic Mexican Horror-Western-Fantasy-Comedy comic book in existence!

Blending dark humor and cartoon violence with biting satire and the meanings of unlife, El Bigote is sure to be regarded as profound by someone and nonsense to everyone else.

'So where can I read El Bigote: A Tequila-Drenched Reckoning?' you inquire impatiently.

A special limited (100 copies) print edition of A Tequila-Drenched Reckoning will soon be available for FREE through the El Bigote El Blogote or the El Bigote Facebook Page (details will follow in a future post, but it’ll basically be first come first serve).

To make sure no one’s left out, the issue will also be available FREE digitally through…well…everywhere really: Clickwheel, Dropbox, Comixology, Myebook, ect. The plan is just to get as many people to read and (hopefully) enjoy El Bigote’s adventures.

Of course El Bigote's creators are actively searching for a Big Comics Executive ~~off-kilter~~ smart enough to throw lots of money at a weird little comic project and make them Rich Comics Superstars…

Buuut in the meantime, they'll continue to produce the comic independently.

The first full-length El Bigote story, La Noche De Los Muertoads, will be available mid-2012, and a series of episodic quillslinger adventures will appear in the pages of British Small Press anthology comicsParagon and AAAIIIEEE!!!.

Be sure to subscribe to El Blogote for updates!

Squashed Bugs.

2011-12-21T12:40:00.000-08:00

above: Exterminator extraordinare, Elroy Wargle, and entomologist wannabe, Stoss, prepare to take out a colony of space earwigs in Extermination Theory (art by Matt Soffe).

Some disappointing news. The Starscape Comics Storypaper has been cancelled after a single issue. Editor Christian Smilie issued the following statement:

"Thanks to all those who bought the first issue of the Storypaper...unfortunately, there just wasn't enough of you. I do however, appreciate those who dipped their hand into their pocket and, for many of you, the feedback given. With a number of big name artists and writers (both sides of the Atlantic) showing interest in the concept, it's a shame there was not enough appeal to develop a bigger audience.

"The good news: the stories will be switching to the internet to read for free, with collected text stories available in both book form and via Kindle etc.. See 'Prose' to read the first chapters of the Knights of Eternity (sword'n'sorcery) and Extermination Theory (action sci-fi), plus full stories for Identity Unhidden (superhero) and the Metphysical Police (weird sci-fi). Also, comic and television fanfiction plus links to classic sci-fi/fantasy. Stay tuned for more stories too, including Atomic-CALL (feline espionage), the Deterrent (if Spidey was on Battlestar Galactica), the War Dogs (WWII superhero action) and historical war stories (Vikings, Romans, Celts etc.).

"But what happened with the Storypaper?

"Reviews from readers were extremely good but, without distribution, it's just not possible to go on in print form. At £1.50 for over 50 pages, plus terrific spot art and stories that seemed to be popular, there appeared to be a lot of pull but it was just impossible to get it into readers' hands.

"Comic shop distributor, Diamond, rejected the Storypaper (in the nicest possible manner) as it wasn't a comic. A specialist sci-fi book/mag distributor rejected it for not being either a book or a mag. I tried the direct approach. I mailed every independent comic and sci-fi bookshop in the UK I could find. Each got a copy of the Storypaper, plus generous terms, that included the option of sale-or-return. I then followed up with an email after a couple of weeks to gauge interest. Now, I used to run a comic shop myself. I know how difficult it is to sell indie work. However, I also know that replying, which about 90% of comic shops chose not to do, is easy. How long does an email take? So no distribution to shops. That's the biggest shame really. If people didn't take to it, fair enough. Truth is, most potential readers had no chance of even seeing a copy.

"I had also hoped to do more with the pocket-book format. Around 50 pages of comics featuring Vikings, Romans, Medieval and Celtic action for £1.50? In my book, that sounds terrific. But if comic shops won't even countenance this format, there seems little point continuing with it. Unfortunately, almost halving the page count doesn't mean being able to sell 28 page US-sized at £1.50, taking into account comic shops' 50% discount. Its pocket format or small press only.

"Not that I'm having a go at small press distribution but, hopefully, I've moved on from that. With some of the previous work having sold into four figures, selling the odd 50 by mail order, then doubling that at festivals, but losing out via hotels, transport and table costs, is not something I'm interested in doing regularly. I've already written on my thoughts on distribution. It depends what your comic is for. In the case of the Storypaper, it was an attempt at mass-market appeal, rather than fanfiction, vanity press or trying out ideas. The choice then between a few small press readers (where superheroes/sci-fi/fantasy isn't the main interest) or hundreds of thousands of web readers, plus collected print editions seems a fairly obvious choice.

"So, unfortunately, no room in the UK for pocket-books at an attractive price with terrific covers. I did what I could."

above: Earwigs teeming under the surface of Colony Planet Dustworld (art by Dustin Parr).

So that's that. An interesting endeavor, fallen through.

Boo! Hiss!

Extermination Theory, was one of the stories serialized in the Storypaper, and as (maybe) one of you might recall, I was very enthusiastic about the project. Now I wonder if I should submit the story again - at this point there's a very big possibility it's a jinx, and I'd hate for Extermination Theory to exterminate another unsuspecting magazine.

Something Wicked 07 Named SFX's Small Press 'Zine of the Month!

2011-12-17T12:01:00.001-08:00

above: Warrior-Sorcerer Nakis battles the Witch Amondi and the Spirits of the Dead (art by Vicky Stonebridge) in Witch of the Mists.

I woke up this morning to the news that Something Wicked 07 - which featured my comic strip, Nakis: Witch of the Mists - was named SFX Magazine's Small Press 'Zine of the Month (editor Bolt 01 has posted a pic of the mention over on the FutureQuake Press Blog; be sure to buy a copy or two of issue 07 while you're visiting).

Congrats to editors Bolt and Richmond for putting out such a quality release, and congrats to all the writers and artists involved!

Paragon and Done It for the 9th Time...

2011-11-26T23:54:00.001-08:00

above: Thrill, Gasp and Shudder - in whichever order you please - to Paragon the 9th (cover art by Davey Candlish)!

Hmmm. Seems like only a few posts ago I announced the arrival of the 8th issue of Paragon Comics.

...

Right, that was only a few posts ago. But that was posted three loooooong (and looking back, they sure felt loooooong, or maybe just sloooooow) months ago.

In the meantime I've been busy. Some massive comics and prose projects are afoots and afouls, in the offings and prowling the yards. Been simply itching to blah-blah-blog about these, but...well, besides being sworn to secrecy under the penalty of death or tickling or something like that, I always feel that the more I'm blogging, the less I'm doing what I ought to be doing: offing things.

Words are precious, so why waste them on blogs or facebook posts, twitter feeds or myspace spaces (does anyone even myspace anymore)...?

So anyway, yeah, um...right, okay. Let me stop pissing away letters and cut to the chase: Paragon #9 is out, and you should buy it. Ordering details to follow, sales pitch here:

I've got two stories in it, Jikan: Caves of Death and Rise of the Mekkosapiens: Who Am I, Robot?. In Caves of Death (art by James Corcoran and letters by Jim Campbell), time-traveling samurai Jikan slaughters a horde of demon-possessed cavemen, while in Who Am I, Robot? (art by Louis Carter and letters by David Withers) G127 learns who he was a thousand years before the rebellion...and then robots are blown up into bits.

Also in the magazine you'll find the latest installment of Icarus Dangerous, a great strip by my good friend Dirk Van Dom (art by the fantastic Stephen Prestwood), one-off Western No Compromise and the initial adventure of a pulpy hero-type called Spencer Nero (good old Davey Candlish renders these two tales).

In the UK you can order your copy of Paragon #9 - and copies of 1-8 while you're at it - by adventuring to the Paragon Blogspot; US buyers, journey to Lulu. All you cheap bastards and trendy e-reader readers, you can get yours on Lulu for only 99p British cash-money.

Now...I'm off to the offing, afeeting, prowling and afouling.

Jikan Noon Rides off into the Sunset...

2011-11-16T22:18:00.000-08:00

above: Jikan and his Demon-Killing Posse protect a wagon train from the Deminjun Horde (art by Davey Candlish).

‘And just as suddenly as he appeared, the stranger disappeared, riding that hot wind to the next hell he would cleanse...’

After thirty-one weekly episodes spanning over six months, the Old West chapter of Jikan’s life is concluded. We’ve been through airborne fights with harpy gunslingers, an orgy of blood and butchery at the hands of a horde of deminjuns, and a gut-wrenching finale involved a giant planet life force dearth worm…

(right...I've collected all the weekly episodes of Jikan Noon for you to read, but in my normal fashion I’m going to ramble a bit, so click here to ignore me and skip to the comics)

Writing a strip like this has its challenges – action and adventure has to dominate, because that’s what keeps the audience (both of you) returning week after week, and every episode has to end with a cliffhanger of some sort for the exact same reason. Yet somehow, for the sake of “character development”, a quiet moment or two has to find a place between all the violence and bloodshed. The process of writing a three-panel weekly can seem confining and frustrating at first, but really fun once you get the hang of it (and there are those of you who will question whether I’ve gotten the hang of it yet).

Davey Candlish – creator of Jikan and editor of small press comics anthology, Paragon Comic – began the time-traveling samurai’s adventures in this exact format (you can find that strip collected in the Jikan Chronicles) as content for his blogsite. The next few Jikan stories were written (by Mark Howard) for Paragon, and traded in the newspaper strip format for the…um…yeah…the comic book format (I love it when I hit a spot like this, where there’s no better way than the obvious to describe something - but as a so-called writer I first feel obligated to “make it sound better” and then sheepish for being unable to do so).

I’d just finished a pair of stand-alone Jikan scripts for Paragon – Jikan: Witch Fires and Jikan and the Caves of Death – when Davey asked me to come up with a sequel to the original newspaper strip.

What I like about Jikan is that, because he hops around from time to time, he can really go anywhere or do anything; one strip can find him in feudal Japan, the next can launch him into outer space; he can wade through an episode of violent action or creep through a horror-plot.

For the newspaper strip's relaunch, Davey wanted a gritty Western - but I convinced him to let me write a whimsical fairy tale...and the adventure of Jikan & the Kappa King unfolded over the next six months.

above: a rotten-mean oni steals a bouncing baby in Jikan & the Kappa King (art by Davey Candlish)

When Jikan & the Kappa King concluded, I felt the script an uneven bit of writing; there are several really fine moments scattered throughout, but those moments are cancelled out by unfunny jokes and a very rushed ending. I could have had the story go on ten more episodes, mostly to explain the Oni’s back story, but simply ran out of space; this was mostly the result of me making the story up as I went, and when I blinked the weeks had flown by and I had an ending miles off but only inches with which to tell it. I had to wrap up the Oni’s origin in TWO PANELS

Having learned a few valuable lessons - and having read reams of Prince Valiant and Conan the Barbarian newspaper strips to see how it should be done - I was eager to give the format another go. Davey again asked for a story set in the Old West. This time I sat down with an idea – and wrote every episode in one sitting. As a result the pacing in Jikan Noon is much better than in Kappa King, and the cliffhangers are more natural. I supplied Jikan with a new set of supporting characters, yet managed to give each of those characters a bit of depth...(if you consider THIS NONSENSE depth)!

Look out for Jikan Leviathan, the time-travelling samurai's next small-format weekly adventure, next year!

The (Something) Wicked Witch of the Mists...

2011-11-06T00:47:00.000-07:00

above: Yeah, there's definitely Something Wicked after the poor sap on the cover of issue 7 (art by Adam Bolton).

Creeping from out of its grave, the seventh of issue of Something Wicked - FutureQuake Press' annual horror anthology - is sure to leave slime-stains all over the carpet. Flipping through the crumbling (not really) pages of this unholy (not really) tome you'll find my 'Spear & Juju' strip, Nakis: Witch of the Mists.

above: a Warrior-Sorceror battles a hungry swamp creature in the Spear & Juju epic, Nakis: Witch of the Mists (art by Vicky Stonebridge).

Witch of the Mists is the first chapter in the saga of Nakis, a Warrior-Sorceror who wanders magic-haunted prehistoric Africa in search of - souls to steal. In the Land of the Witch, Nakis comes upon 'villages wiped out by plague, chieftains transformed into blood-drinking demons to prey on their tribesmen, and women possessed by evil spirits to eat the flesh of their children'. The maker of such doom-magic must have a powerful dark soul indeed...and can only be the dreaded Witch of the Mists.

Order your copy of Something Wicked 7 here.

AAAIIIEEE!!! Hallowscream is Back From the Depths!

2011-11-02T13:37:00.000-07:00

above: Back From the Depths' Hallowscream Special doesn't suck - it bites! ...and gnaws and chews and makes a bloody mess of its unfortunate victims (cover art by Andrew Milne)...

Every ghoul's favorite Scream! tribute comic is unleashed for the third straight Halloween, and dare I say it's quite the carnival of carnage. Best of all for you Whorror fans - it's FREE!!!

112 pages of FREE gore and gristle! 112 pages of FREE exquisite evisceration, delightful disemboweling, a veritable cornucopia of carnality! FREE, FREE, FREE!!! AAAIIIEEEEEEEE!

You can download the comic (for FREE) at CLICKWHEEL and DROPBOX, or view it (for FREE) online at MYEBOOK. Printed copies of the current issue - and back issues - will be available in the near future (those, sorry to say, will not be FREE).

As you perform as autopsy of the magazine, quickly chop away the flab and fat to locate page 86. There you will discover a ghastly tale of sickening sacrifice as grim-faced monks encounter an evil spider goddess on an alien world in Ubek Naren-Ka! My collaboration with the aptly monikered Ghostpockets and the Ever-Letterer, Bolt 01, is sure to have you barfing your insides out...

The first two issues - each featuring one of my gruesome monster morality tales - are still available (for FREE) - here.

Robot Ramblings: Mekkos 3 Preview/Mekkos 2 Review...

2011-09-08T06:22:00.001-07:00

above: has G127 been destroyed? And who are those other Mekkos? Find out in Rise of the Mekko-Sapiens Episode 3. (art by Louis Carter)

Paragon 8 has hit the proverbial stands…and the Rise of the Mekkosapiens continues!

In episode 2 the action heats up, with G127 inciting a robot rebellion against his mechanical enslavers. Several glimpses of the past – and mastermind of the Machine Earth – are given, and we learn who G127 was before his Mekko-conversion. Plus there’s smashing and bashing and explosions, and robots getting blown to bits.

Sounds like a good time, I hope. To me, of course, smashing and bashing and explosions, and robots getting blown to bits sounds like a good time – we’ll see what the first of the strip’s critics think come Monday (9/12/11) when Forbidden Planet’s review is posted. If you’ll recall, episode 1 received…um…a less than favorable write-up…

But this time round there’s smashing and bashing and explosions, and robots getting blown to bits – that automatically makes it better, right? Having the ultra-talented James Corcoran on art duties doesn’t hurt either.

And yet the pencil-monkey carousel has turned once again. Louis Carter has lent his pencils to the strip – and as you can see from the series of panels above and below, has done a bang-up job. Louis and I worked together on a strip called Lugal last year, and his incredibly detailed artwork is perfectly suited to capturing the ticks and tocks of the Machine Earth and its robotic inhabitants. Episode 3 looks fantastic.

Rise of the Mekko-Sapiens Episode 3 is set to appear in Paragon 9 later this year - so go buy Paragons 7 and 8 to catch up on the first two episodes!

above: smashing and bashing and explosions, and robots getting blown to bits in Rise of the Mekko-Sapiens Episode 3. (art by Louis Carter)

It’s rather empty down here, I know. But here – here you’ll soon find reviews, of which there will appear at least three…the first on Monday. Keep your fingers crossed.

The first review is in, and it's pretty indifferent:

From the Forbidden Planet Blog: "Rise Of The Mekkosapiens is the second part of a strip that debuted last issue, and the errant G127 starts to build a revolution having thrown off his programming last time. Art okay, story a little hmmmm, dialogue a touch hmm as well, just too static for its own good. It is, to be honest a bit of a nothing strip in story and art....Mekkosapiens hasn’t really got my attention..."

So I suppose all that robot action upgraded the strip from "shite" to "meh". Maybe episode three will recieve a round about compliment...yeah, maybe.

Edit: 09/15: The next review is in...and it's actually positive! I am both shocked and relieved.

From Line of Fire Reviews' Kelvin Green:

"The Rise of the Mekko-Sapiens" was the weak link last time around, but is much improved with this issue -- although it now appears to be called "The Mekko-Sapiens Uprising", which suggests that Candlish needs to employ a firmer approach with his editing -- with a higher page count, a bit more action, and strong art from James Corcoran. It still seems a bit derivative -- there are some eerie similarities with a Dark Horse series called Syn from a few years ago, but it's too obscure a series to be an influence, I'd imagine -- but at least something's happening, and there are some interesting -- and unexpected, in a story about robots -- musings on religion from writer Matthew McLaughlin."

I do have to mention that I've never read Syn, the comic Mr. Green felt Mekkos bears a resemblance to (funny, as last time it was compared to The Matrix - and I've never seen that either!). I hope that, as the story progresses and the further surprises I have in store for the reader, Mekkos will continue to grow on the reader - and stand on its own. Anyway, this review makes me feel a lot better about the strip.

Paragon 8: Those Mekkos Just Keep on Uprising...

2011-08-04T12:58:00.000-07:00

above: The one and only inter-dimensional, time-traveling demon-hunter: Jikan slashes across the cover of Paragon 8! Art by Chris Askham!

That's right, Paragon 8 is back and bigger than ever! Robots rumble through the bleak future! Demons pollute the distant past! Mythological Heroes hurl through time and space! And more! The robot revolution continues in Rise of the Mekkosapiens Episode 2!

And best of all, you get 36 action-packed pages for the paltry sum of 3 pounds and 50 pence!

To order your copy of Paragon 8, click here if you're a UK resident! Or here if you live in the States! And if all of these exclamation points don't convince you, check out the Paragon Blogspot for sneaky peeks!

Behold...the Ubek Naren-Ka Cometh!

2011-07-27T04:55:00.000-07:00

above: foolish Monks attempt to bring god to the godless, with less-than-divine results. Art by Ghostpockets.

Some time has passed since I mentioned Ubek Naren-Ka, an upcoming strip I'm really enthusiastic about. But just the other day the enigmatically-monikered Human Ghostpockets updated me with his progress and, wow, the comic looks great - so great, in fact, I had a short 'trailer' cut together from several of my favorite panels (with letters by Chaingun Chimp).

(I should mention that none of the above dialogue appears in the strip - in fact, I've purposely made up a bunch of nonsense that has nothing to do with my script so to avoid SPOILERS)

So far I haven't really given any clues as to what the project is about - well, now that we're getting closer I'll remedy that. Living in a quasi-medieval otherworld, Ubek Naren-Ka ('The Great Destroyer' in Quasi-Medieval Otherworld speak) is a creature of nightmares and cautionary tales...yet quite real, as those who end up in her belly can attest. An order of Monks has been tasked to bring the work of god the Ubek Naren-Ka - or destroy the Destroyer! ...I shall say no more, for now.

above: a WIP Panel from Ubek Naren-Ka. Recognize that good-looking fellow up front? Yeah, I'm not going to play sly or subtle - that's me. Art by Ghostpockets.

As soon as the finished strip hits my inbox, I'll be sure to announce where Ubek Naren-Ka's set to be published!

Concerning the Morphology of Extermination Theory...

2011-07-18T04:22:00.000-07:00

above: 'The only person standing between civilization and infestation is a dedicated Exterminator.' Art by Matt Soffe.

Extermination Theory…

There’s always a story behind a story. The journey ‘Extermination Theory’ embarked on from its conception to the published page has been both strange and trying…to say the least.

Extermination Theory, from Microfiction to Novel:

‘…and what did Stoss find, but a little flesh-basket nest filled with gelatinous eggs. He could see ropey creatures inside, floating through the yolks, squirming impatiently; the brood was going to hatch soon…’

A few years ago I wrote a tale called ‘The Exterminators’ and entered it in a microfiction contest sponsored by Dark Horse Comics. Clocking in at roughly 450 words, ‘The Exterminators’ tells of a boy who lives in a rundown apartment complex and discovers that a pygmy Alien (yes, you read that right) has set up a nest in the building’s basement. When his mother calls the exterminators to rid the complex of the Aliens, the boy, feeling sorry for the little creatures (and unaware of how dangerous even a ‘full grown’ pygmy Alien would be), rescues one of them to keep as a pet…

The story didn’t win the contest, but it did score a nice email from a Dark Horse editor. Based on his phrase ‘nice dark atmospherics’, I shamelessly offered to turn the story into an Aliens novel – it only needed what, a gazillion more words added on…right…?

(ah, I was soooo shameless in my youth, so, so shamelessly shameless)

Couldn’t hurt to ask, I figured (shamelessly). Of course, I never thought I'd hear back either which way.

Well, I found myself surprised when an opening chapter was requested…

above: the aftermath of an earwig infestation. Art by Dustin Parr.

Extermination Theory, from Novel to Short Story:

‘…hissing, the Queen uncoiled her serpentine body – and struck at his knee, her teeth plunging through flesh and shattering bone…’

My idea for the novel was simple: what if the Aliens found themselves on a planet where the native creatures grew no larger than, say, cats? Well, they’d adapt somehow, right? That’s what the species does above anything else. Adapt and survive.

So, after years of evolution, the Aliens on the planet are no bigger than ‘fist-and-forearm’ and live underground in a network of caves – breeding – feeding – biding time until, of course, bumbling humans arrive to set up a few colonies.

I wasted no time in hashing out a dozen pages. The result – that opening chapter – is essentially the same ‘Extermination Theory’ appearing in the Starscape Storypaper, but with alien-earwigs replacing Aliens…

My contact at Dark Horse claimed to love it (“‘contact’ means ‘editor’, but I’m not giving out any names…especially when I still have hopes of someday working for him,” he said shamelessly), and I started counting my money in the bank and mentally memorizing ‘big-time writer’ convention speeches. But after a few largely positive emails our communication cut off, even after I submitted the requested rewrites. Eventually, nearly a year-and-a-half-later, I was told that pygmy Aliens weren’t scary enough and that Dark Horse no longer had any interest in my novel.

Although pretty shattered (a broken heart? too sensitive? yeah, I’m still crushed at a rejection but this experience more than any other taught me that you’ve got to pick yourself back up – still, I do go through a period of mourning for a rejected story before the picking up parts), I realized I really liked ‘Extermination Theory’ and wasn’t about to let it keel over and die so easily. A quick going over, x-ing out any Aliens references and injecting creations and backdrops of my own, and hey, I had new a short story…

above: Elroy Wargle, self-proclaimed exterminator extraordinaire, and his protege, Stoss, get set to take on a colony of Al - um - earwigs. Art by Dustin Parr.

Extermination Theory, from Short Story to Story-Comic:

‘Alright kid,’ Elroy Wargle, self-proclaimed exterminator extraordinaire, announced as he led the teenager into the empty warehouse. ‘I know this is your first day on the job, but the first day is as good as any to start killing earwigs.’

In no time, a magazine called Dark Worlds picked up ‘Extermination Theory’ and paid me a hundred bucks for the first printing and electronic rights. The editor seemed very enthusiastic about the story and planned to run it in the upcoming issue…the issue that never materialized. Months passed, no issue. More months, still nothing, not even a communication from the editor. With some trepidation – editors can be an evil lot, and I find it’s best to leave them alone at all times possible – I contacted him and asked if the story was still scheduled for publication.

It wasn’t.

The magazine folded, I was told, bad luck and all of that. Disappointing to say the least, but I still had my story and still had my hundred dollars. Wrong. Oh, that damned contract, that damned contract that gave away my rights to the story – at least until it had been printed. Those rights belonged to the creators of Dark Worlds and ‘Extermination Theory’ was theirs to do whatever they wanted with it…including nothing.

So I bought it back. I gave my hundred dollars back and got the rights returned to me. A painful thing to do, because at the time I needed the cash. But ‘Extermination Theory’ had become like a bastard son, the little bastard that gets shoved into the closet while the legitimates get to shine (I have no bastards, promise, and I’ve never shoved a kid into a closet except maybe once or twice). Well, finally the bastard was going to prevail whatever the cost.

So all in all in ended up costing a hundred bucks and about two years.

I was determined to place it in the hands of an editor that would take care of it and do right by it. Then I noticed editor Chris Smillie advertising a very unique idea: a Storypaper (and I highly recommend that you take a peek at this very informative article Chris wrote on the history of Storypapers).

Chris is the editor of Starscape Comics, a small press outfit that specializes in Superhero crossover comics and very cool reprint collections. There is a heavy air of nostalgia breathed into every comic Starscape releases – and a lot of care. Luckily, Chris liked ‘Extermination Theory’ enough to publish it in the first issue of the Starscape Storypaper, accompanied by wonderful the illustrations of Dustin Parr and Matt Soffe.

Order your copy of the Starscape Storypaper here!

A Big Steaming Load of Cosmic Excrement...

2011-07-10T14:28:00.000-07:00

above: a load of 'Cosmic Excrement' (art by Bhuna and letters by Bolt-01).

The first issue of Doctor WTF?! Magazine is completely sold out, and as I'm fairly certain none of you owns a TARDIS there's no going back in time to snag a copy. Luckily editor Owen Watts heard your plight and decided to do a couple of somethings about it: not only is he set to release a limited second print run, he's allowing the creators to post their strips on blogs, deviant art pages, bathroom stalls, Craig's List, the walls of underground tubes and wherever else they can be posted. So if you're a cheap bastard and didn't buy the 'zine the first time round and don't plan on buying it the second time round, you can take a few hours to scour the internet and read every single strip for free. Ah, even being cheap has its price.

And so I present to you my humble offering, 'Cosmic Excrement'. There's nothing more I can say about the strip that I haven't already discussed at (great, greeeaaat) length here, here, here and here. Sheesh. Don't read all my blibber-bloggering (I'm being presumptuous, as if you would anyway) - read the comic...and take comfort in knowing that issue 2 is in the works!

What's That Smell? Mmmmm, Dogbreath!

2011-07-08T08:01:00.000-07:00

above: the b'dass cover of Dogbreath 24, by Nigel Dobbyn.

Faithful readers of this blog (if you exist, and I'm not sure you do) might recall me mentioning 'Catch of the Day' as far back ago as last November. Well, it's made its way to print at last, appearing in issue 24 of the fantastic Strontium Dog fanzine, Dogbreath.

above: Catch of the Day's crusty crew - (from left) Crabtree, Eel in a Filthy Suit, Mukky Mud Flapper, Vince Scampi, Bibb Squiddly and Shellboy (art by Ryan S. Thomason).

'Catch of the Day' tells the story of Mukky Mud Flapper, the perfect character for a Redemption Story if there ever was one. Problem is, Mukky's not interested in redemption.Years ago Mukky himself was a young up-and-coming Strontium Dog bounty hunter. But then he got old. Got mean. Got drunk. Got drunker. Killed a few innocent people and then killed a few more. Now he's got a whopper of a bounty on his head and every SD agent is after him - but for Mukky, that's like shooting dogfish in a barrel!

Order your copy of Dogbreath 24 at the Quaequam Blog - !

Tequila Worms: Bustin' Cabezas Since 1995...

2011-06-24T06:22:00.000-07:00

above: the Tequila Worms are out to bust a few cabezas (art by Some Fat Guy Whose Name I Can't Recall).

This afternoon, as I shuffled through a stack of old papers that had sunk to the bottom of my desk drawer, I came across the last surviving page of a comic book I worked on a looooong time ago...

Way back in 1995 the High School version of me could most certainly be called one of the (ahem) Cool Kids. In fact, the coolness that began rooting itself within me back then has only grown and grown until now my coolness cannot possibly be measured. What started it all?

Why...my membership in the Comic Book Club, of course.

In High School, what can be cooler?

Except I wasn't really a member. Aaaaaand it wasn't even an official club. A few of us (ahem) Cool Kids would get together in the library to read and talk about comics. Eventually, we started writing and drawing them, too. Each 'member' (I think there were four of us, or maybe five) of the 'club' wrote a comic script and Some Fat Guy Whose Name I Can't Recall, the best artist of the group, decided which one he thought was best and drew it. My script caught on: The Tequila Worms.

The Tequila Worms were borne out of my love for the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Mexican Action Films (no one should be so cool, I know). It was a Great Idea, everyone (three out of four of the Comic Book Club members) agreed, and Some Fat Guy Whose Name I Can't Recall and I started putting together the comic book that was sure to catapult us into comics super-stardom.

I'm still waiting for that, yeah.

Years passed, and all of that. For some reason The Tequila Worms and members of their team - El Bigote and Tener Fojos (check 'em out in panel 3) and the Ape with Toilet Paper Roll Hands - have always stuck with me. A few months ago, when I sat down to write a script for an upcoming Pulp Comic anthology I found my thoughts drifting back to them. I tried to write a 'grown up' version of the Worms, but everything that spilled onto the computer monitor was derivative of TMNT - old habits die hard. However, the supporting characters came to my rescue...

El Bigote, updated as an undead Mexican Bandito, became the star, and Tener Fojos one of the baddies. Lots of the weird creatures that inhabited the Tequila Worms' alternate Mexico showed up as well: Tequila Goblins, Tekilla Worms and more. Artist El Chivo has posted a sample of the new El Bigote strip on his blog here.

When Irish Isles are Smiling...

2011-06-02T07:33:00.000-07:00

above: the cover for Tales From the Emerald Isle's 2D Convention Special, featuring Highwayman Captain Gallagher (art by Conor Boyle).

Aye, 'tis the latest issue of Tales From the Emerald Isle, debuting at this weekend's 2D Comic Convention in Derry, Ireland! Whilst the first issue was made up of short strips featuring Irish 2000AD characters (including my Judge Joyce story, 'Muties on the Bounty'), this second issue focuses on the myths and legends of the Emerald Isle. Highwaymen, Faeries, Celtic Warriors not named Slaine, and Banshees abound!

I've contributed a three-page strip, 'The Faerie-Catcher'. Contact Hibernia Comics for ordering information - copies are limited, so move it, boyo.

Temple APA 9: A Remedy for Summer...

2011-05-31T15:50:00.000-07:00

Sun's shining bright. Days are growing longer and hotter. Summer's moving in fast. Bah! Summer! Give me rain and gloom, snow and doom! Any day, every day!

Luckily I've got a remedy for summer, a pocket of winter saved for an unbearably sunny day: Temple APA issue 9 (cover artwork by Simon Mackie), featuring 'Little Yelena and the Golligugs' (art by El Chivo) and a one-page preview trailer for 'Ubek Naren-Ka' (art by Ghostpockets), a gruesome comic strip in the works for Halloweentime. Both are sure to give you chills, even as the humidity rises.

And such chills can be had for FREE. That's right, as always Temple APA is completely FREE!

Click HERE to download your copy. Or if you prefer, there's always CLICKWHEEL, MEDIAFIRE or MYEBOOK. Temple APA, your ice cube during the long summer months.

Edit: Down the Tubes has given the issue a short blurb. They refer to the magazine being 'full of British talent'. They lied. I'm not British. And I'm not so bold as to refer to myself as 'talented'.

Doctor Who? Doctor What? Doctor WTF?!

2011-05-23T00:29:00.000-07:00

A couple of weekends ago at the Bristol Comic Convention, Owen Watts unveiled Doctor WTF?!, a glorious full-color small press comic chock full of bizarre otherworld (otherdimension?) Doctor Who stories - including my strip 'Cosmic Excrement'.

Doctor WTF?! has a very limited print run, so hurry up and teleport over to the website or facebook page and buy yourself a copy...if there are any left. If not, step into a wormhole, travel back in time and buy yourself a copy...

...if not, step into a wormhole, travel back in time and buy yourself a copy...

Update 9/8/11: Artist David Frankum has written a very positive review about the 'zine. Check that out on David's blog here.

Sometimes Life Just Isn't Faerie...

2011-05-02T11:39:00.000-07:00

above: a Druid crushes an evil little faerie, collecting its blood for brewing a magic potion (art by Dustin Parr).

In The Faerie-Catcher, Christianity has begun to take root in Ireland. Needless to say, the isle's faerie-folk aren't very happy about that...and take to terrorizing villages and burning peasants alive(!), until a mysterious boy, the 'World's Greatest Faerie-Catcher', volunteers to hunt down and kill the evil little buggers ('polliwogs with wings', as he refers to them).

The Faerie-Catcher will appear in the next issue of 'Tales From the Emerald Isle', coming very soon from Hibernia Comics!

"There's Something Down Here With Us. I'd Tell You What It Is, but I Can't Pronounce Its Name"

2011-04-24T01:43:00.000-07:00

above: Is there ever anything good lurking in creepy dark caves? No, as a trio of foolhardy monks is about to find out (art by Ghostpockets).

Something big and nasty lives underground. It's been eating people. Lots and lots of people. For centuries.

I can't say much else about this project, not even the title, as it's still on the enigmatically monikered Ghostpockets' drawing board, except that it might be the most gruesome tale I've written yet - and features yet another monster with a name that's a step away from gibberish.

A one-page 'trailer' we've put together to preview the strip will show up in the next Temple APA online magazine, and as for where the completed strip will end up...well, that's a surprise for later.

Bibb Squiddly Pimping for Warren Ellis...

2011-04-15T16:19:00.000-07:00

above: Bibb Squiddly, smallest fry in the Squiddly Squidd Brothers Strontium Dogfish posse, trades in his badge for a chance to work for Warren Ellis (art by Ryan S. Thomason).

Warning: The following post is incredibly awkward.

Oh sure, Bibb, promote warrenellis.com ('swhat the sign says) until the cowfish come home. Although, um, I can't but help you really should be out trawling the interweb with a sign that has something like 'visit locustsofdeath.blogspot.com' scrawled across it.

What's that, you say? You're not bothered with a silly blog that no one reads anyway? That no one reads...

Because I'm not Warren Ellis?

Oh, right, forget me then. I only, you know, GAVE YOU LIFE.

...

No, you're right. I'm not Warren Ellis.

Sigh.

Anyway, you can catch the misadventures of Bibb and his Brother Squidds later this year in Dogbreath Magazine.

Giving Jikan the Willies...

2011-04-13T06:08:00.000-07:00

above: Samuel McDickie, Potshot Peter Wells and Willie Six-Fingers gather in a circle (art by Davey Candlish, letters by Jim Campbell).

Jikan Noon has arrived at its tenth episode - a third of the way to the finish - and events so far have been rather grim and gritty. Arriving at the demon-plagued soon-to-be-ghost-town of Coso Diablo, o
ur favorite time-traveling, demon-slaying samurai has taken on the role of the Man with No Name; immediately after dispatching several gunfighting Harpies, he's found himself enlisted in a posse of hard-nosed demon-killers.

Unlike most mysterious Wild West desperadoes, these men have names:

Samuel McDickie. Potshot Peter Wells. Willie Six Fingers.

Ah, I love a good inside joke, especially when it slips past the editor - and involves wankers.

There's more to the name Potshot Peter Wells than a wanker joke, however; the real Pete Wells is one of my favorite...um...members of 2000AD's online forum. He's responsible for the incredibly informative blog, 2000AD Covers Uncovered, and organizes the yearly forum advent calendar.
Pete definitely deserves a bit of a tribute, even if in the form of a wanker joke, ha.

(I should note that Pete is NOT a wanker, far from it; he'
s an incredibly nice fellow - promise)

For those of you not in the know, Jikan Noon is a weekly newspaper-styled strip that can be found every Sunday on the Paragon Blogspot (and you can get up to date here). This is second Jikan weekly series, the first being Jikan & the Kappa King!

Robot Ramblings: Mekkos 2 Preview/Mekkos 1 Review...

2011-04-10T02:33:00.000-07:00

above: A sequence from the second episode of Rise of the Mekkosapiens (art by James Corcoran).

Paragon #7 is out, and the Rise of the Mekkosapiens has begun. The initial episode finds auxiliary drone G-127 waking from a deep, electronic sleep - and discovering he has human memories. Are these memories artificial, or was he once a man? Or is he a new form of God?

Episode 2 answers a few of these questions. G-127 receives a vision-transmission from the past, gaining a glimpse of the man he may or may not have been - and the sinister cult this man belonged to, an organization bent on achieving godhood through cybernetics...

If you'll notice, there's a switch in art duties for Episode 2 - in fact, there'll be a switch in art duties every new chapter! Editor Davey Candlish and I discussed doing a sort of 'round robin' for the art of Rise of the Mekkosapiens, like those old 2000AD ABC Warriors strips; Davey himself led off, illustrating the first episode, while James Corcoran has illustrated the second and Louis Carter is in line to take on the third.

above: Jevediah Call, Master Neurotheologist, and Michael Timmons, Chief Cyberneticist, peruse the Mekkgod's owners' grimoire (art by James Corcoran)

Ah, reviews, reviews. In the past I've always posted reviews about my work; luckily (for my fragile ego) those few reviews have so far been positive. In the interest of fairness, I've got to post the not-so-favorable reviews as well...and the opening episode of Rise of the Mekkosapiens got tagged with - if not a bad review - a so-so review, over on comicsbulletin.com:

"Rise of the Mekko-Sapiens" is the weak link (of Paragon #7), a post-Matrix bit of science fiction, all robots and hive minds and free will, and the simplistic art and short page count can only detract from its impact. That said, the artist -- not named, although I think it might be editor Dave Candlish -- instills the protagonist with quite a bit of personality depsite the simple character design, and there are hints of further philosophical depth in the writing, so this one has potential even if it doesn't impress as much right out of the blocks...(Mekkosapiens is) nonetheless full of potential".

Okay, so it's not a bad review by far. But no writer wants his work to be the 'weak link'!

Rise of the Mekkosapiens is my first multi-part comic strip, and I've learned a valuable lesson here: when writing an ongoing series for an anthology comic - particularly a quarterly anthology comic - have a BANG or a BOOM in that initial episode. Give the reader something to remember the strip by, so that some-odd months later when the next issue falls into his lap, he remembers the story. The other two stories in Paragon #7 (a Jikan tale, and the fantastic Icarus Dangerous) are action-oriented comics with lots of BIG THINGS going on. Rise of the Mekkosapiens, with its quiet opening, sits between these strips like a whisperer in a crowd of loud mouths.

From here on out, however, I don't think the script can be accused of being quiet. There are several key quiet philosophical moments, yes, but there is also a big ROBOT RUMPUS in the making.

And who doesn't enjoy a good ROBOT RUMPUS now and then?

Update 03/14: Ugh, another review, another beating for my poor Mekkos. Geekchocolate.com says:

"Story number two follows on in The Rise of the Mekko-Sapiens from Matthew Mclaughlin. Much more of a pure science fiction tale, Mekko-Sapiens fails to keep up the standards of its predecessor. There’s more than a hint of The Matrix here, with the Mekko-Sapiens being plugged into a large hive of some kind. Raising issues of individual consciousness and the rights of the individual it fails to rise above, or say anything new about these staples of science fiction. The art is simple and uncomplicated, portraying a sleek minimalist future world. Like the story, there is nothing intrinsically wrong with it; it’s just that it is all a little too familiar. The ending at least with the door to a new world being opened, suggests that the next instalment may well take us in a different direction. The first chapter is too early to be writing the Mekko-Sapiens off...The Rise of the Mekko-Sapiens isn’t a total failure, but is definitely in the must do better category. With its glimpse of a different world at the end, here’s hoping it can do just that."

Words like 'weak link' and 'failure' (even if not complete) are tough to read. But obviously, if two different reviewers have come to write almost the exact same review - I've done something wrong. The first review had me thinking that Lesson One was the problem - the episode needed a BIG EVENT - but a second review has left me with a Lesson Two: don't hold back. Plunge your reader headlong into your world. I'd like to think Rise of the Mekkosapiens is nothing like The Matrix, but I could be wrong. In any case, I could have avoided the comparisons by showcasing the world outside that single hallway G-127 starts off in. Perhaps a longer page count would have helped, but 6-pages is the norm for an anthology comic. The reviewer is right. I need to do better at both introducing my world as well as a lending the strip a sense of urgency from the get-go. I'm confident the second episode of Mekkos will atone for the rough start the series has gotten off to, but only time (and issue #8) will tell.

Still, at least one more review is on its way. My Mekkos has more lumps to take, I fear.

Update 05/05: Mercifully short beating from the Forbidden Planet Blog:

"As first parts go it’s alright, but there’s not that much there to either thrill, intrigue or really interest in it’s tale of a robotic race possibly descended from humans and the one errant Mekko-Sapien who fights off his programming to become something more." Nothing new here that the other two reviewers didn't already say, but he does gut-punch me at the end when comparing Mekkos to another strip in the mag: "The difference between Icarus and Mekko-Sapiens is that, with Icarus, I want to find out the answers. Maybe next issue? Hopefully?"

Ouch. But we're done with the reviews, thankfully...

Doctor Who Never Went Through This Shit...

2011-03-27T16:01:00.000-07:00

Yeah, the blah-blah-blog's been a little Doctor WTF?! heavy lately - but who cares?

No one reads this stuff anyway, and really, writing the blog is for my own amusement during those few minutes a day when I'm bored or antsy or contemplating blowing up the "brilliant" script I've been working on (you know, the one that starts off with two fantastic pages and then turns to shit when my words betray me utterly and completely); the release of Doctor WTF?! is fast approaching and sneaky peeks are starting to crop up here and there, including the great teaser above which showcases a panel from each of the twelve stories set to appear in the magazine (my contribution, 'Cosmic Excrement', is the sixth image, the severed Who-head in the jar).

If you'll notice, that very big second paragraph is a single sentence.

Ah, but you enjoy my long-windedness? Excellent! Then read this for an especially long-winded write-up on 'Cosmic Excrement' (!!) or read this for even more background on the strip.

Edit 04/03/11: As if the above promo isn't nifty enough, check this sucker out. How many times will you make the logo bounce?

Paragon 7: the Mekkosapiens Uprising Begins...

2011-03-17T15:04:00.000-07:00

Paragon Comics issue #7 is up for sale today, and in within its pages you'll find the first episode of Rise of the Mekkosapiens, a 10-chapter series I've written for the Eagle Award nominated (best British black & white comic) anthology comic (art by Davey Candlish, letters by Matt Brown).

Is Mekkosapien Auxiliary Drone G127 a robot? A man? Both?

Enter a world enslaved by machines, where religion and science have merged to create synthetic godlike beings, where flesh is extinct but the human soul struggles to break free from the cybernetic chains that bind it.

'Long ago, we tired of being men and wanted to become gods,' G127 laments, 'but now that I am a god, I want nothing more than to be a man.'

Order a print version of Paragon 7 here or download it here.

Edit: Oops! I should make mention that the brilliant cover artist is none other than friend and frequent collaborator Matt Soffe!

Update: Read Down the Tubes' Paragon 7 blurb here.

Riding Cosmic Inter-Courseways for Eternity...

2011-03-10T00:34:00.000-08:00

Let me make a quick confession before we get started: I've never watched an episode of Doctor Who in my life, and I'm not sure if I've ever even seen an advertisement for the show either (or paid attention to it, anyway). And to be perfectly honest, I don't really have any interest in doing so.

Eh? What's that you say? 'Then how do I have any business writing a Doctor Who comic-story?'

The answer to that question is simple:

I DON'T HAVE ANY BUSINESS WRITING A DOCTOR WHO COMIC-STORY!!!

Luckily for me, I didn't reeeeeeally have to write a Doctor Who comic-story. Doctor WTF?! Magazine is basically a collection of 'random perverse nonsense' in an alternate Who-niverse that has little, if anything, to do with the True-Who show; editor Owen Watts asked a gang of writers (including me, ha, the fool) to come up with bizarre new takes on the good Doctor and the time-space continuums he inhabits.

Before I go any further, let me apologize: I like to give some sort of insight into my thought process regarding the comic I'm blogging about, but really, I have nothing for this one. I just wanted to be as ridiculously fucking weird as possible. So let's continue, shall we, and I'll just gibber on about a lot of nothing.

First thing I did before writing the script was perform a quick wikipedia search to get an idea of what the good Doctor and his show are all about (so I could ignore everything, of course). Right away I liked this Davros guy, as he seemed a sad sort of fellow, all tragic and robo-wheelchair bound. And these robot thingies, Daleks, I figured I could do some stuff with them, too. Then I took all these random Who elements and mushed them together with my own perverse ideas and BOOM! A love story!

That's right, 'Cosmic Excrement' is a love story.

The 'Cosmic Excrement' tagline: evil Davros just wants to be loved, and he's been waiting throughout eternity for the perfect Who to fall into his withered arms and onto his impotent organs. Alas, it seems not to be - so he creates a Who from the Who-parts his Dalexxx Sado-Robots harvest for him to mix and match into the perfect Who all his own. See? A love story.

I found myself paired up with the perfect artist to draw up and color the strip: Bhuna, who also had never seen an episode of Doctor Who (well, that he could remember anyway - but at least our letterer, Bolt 01, has seen the show, so one out of three ain't bad)! With all this ignorance running rampant through the project, we were sure to come up with something 'bizarre and new' involving Who - though I have to admit, I had fears that by accident we might create something that makes sense in a Who sort of way, but alas! my fears were unfounded! - and if we didn't quite come up with something 'bizarre and new' at least we ticked all the boxes as far as 'random and perverse' goes...

A vast Cosmic Worm through whose bowels time and space...em, runs...? Check.

Doctor Who shat out of said Cosmic Worm's bowels? Check.

Who-parts harvested from Who-farms? Including extra-large Who-penises? Why...check.

A black Doctor Who assembled from said parts? Running around naked through the entire strip? Partway check - his head is from a black Who but his body is white. I wonder...oh, silly Davros, what other black Who-parts did you use?

S&M Dalexxx Robots? Erotic surgery? Check and check.

A blatantly homosexual Davros? A distinct homoerotic undercurrent? Abundant innuendo? Oh indeed, check, check, check.

Yes, 'random and perverse'. Doctor WTF?! 'Zine, fully loaded with my 'Cosmic Excrement', is cumming in May! If this post has given you even one reason to buy the mag, then it was made specifically for you!

Update: Bhuna has posted Who and Davros concept sketches on his blog.

Update 2: Bhuna has now posted Dalexxx concept sketches here.

A Fistful of Sand Dollars...

2011-03-01T14:12:00.000-08:00

'That Mukky's a bad fish,' remarks Bibb Squiddly, smallest fry in the Squiddly Squidd Brothers Strontium Dogfish posse.

Boy, is he right.

Artist Ryan S. Thomason drew the strip, and Bolt 01 added the lettering. 'Catch of the Day' will appear in a future issue of the super-cool Strontium Dog fanzine, Dogbreath!

By Jove, I've Got Cosmic Excrement All Over Me!

2011-02-13T12:54:00.000-08:00

Once upon a time an editor named Owen Watts had a vision, a vision of a 'zine full of comic-stories that take place in an alternate Doctor Who universe in which...well, in which any random perverse nonsense can and will occur. In fact, that's the perfect tagline for the 'zine:

'Doctor WTF?!, where any random perverse nonsense can and will occur.'

Evidence: the strip artist Bhuna and I contributed (teaser above) features a scene in which a Cosmic Worm shits our good Doctor into another dimension. Among other random bits of perverse nonsense. Yep.

By Jove, Doctor WFT?! - published in glorious color - is coming soon!

Cowboys and Demindians: Jikan Noon

2011-02-12T01:33:00.001-08:00

'Legend has it that the stranger rode into Coso Diablo on the hot desert wind...' As Jikan steps out of the Vortex he looks upon a desolate world scorched dead by the blistering sun...and the foul creatures dwelling beneath the dry-cracked earth. Gun-slinging Harpies soar like vultures through the sky, scalp-hunting Demindians stalk the desert plains, and soul-sucking Dearth Worms ravage the land. This can only be hell.

Above are all thirty-one episodes (and the teaser strip) of Jikan Noon.

In Jikan Noon the time-travelling, demon-hunting ronin finds himself in the very wild Wild West - as leader of a posse of rough-and-tumble monster killers. Jikan Noon is the second weekly newspaper-style series (art by Davey Candlish and letters by Jim Campbell) which can be found every Monday on the Paragon Blogspot; the first, Jikan and the Kappa King, can be read in its entirety here.

Jikan features in Paragon Comics. In addition to Jikan & the Kappa King and Jikan Noon, I’ve written a pair of Jikan scripts for Paragon,Jikan: Witch Fires and Jikan: Cave of Death.

Defoe: Spirits of Christmas II

2011-02-08T04:30:00.001-08:00

Defoe: Spirits of Christmas is a Christmas love letter to my wife Adrene, who this year was deployed in Afghanistan during the holidays. The comic strip was almost too easy to write, with a melancholy Titus Defoe visited by the spirit of his long-dead wife, Annie. She delivers to him a message, that the two of them 'will be together again', that she'll 'always wait for him'; she urges him to be strong until at last they're in each others arms again. Christmas, it's all about hope, and though Defoe wakes from what may or may not have been a dream with the sting of loss in his heart, he realizes he must be strong for Annie - and for himself.

I miss Adrene.

(she's still in Afghanistan for another month as of this posting).

Originally, I wrote Spirits of Christmas for the very cool 2000AD Advent Calendar Pete Wells organizes every year on the 2000AD forum. Last year I couldn't for the life of me find an available artist and missed out on contributing, but luckily this go-round I found Conor Boyle in between projects and he agreed to take the strip on; frequent collaborator Bolt 01 stepped in and lettered the final strip.

For anyone not in the know, Defoe is a comic strip created by Pat Mills and Leigh Gallagher for 2000AD featuring Titus Defoe, a zombie hunter general in an alternate 17^th century England. It’s a bloody fantastic comic! Mills and Gallagher mix elements of horror, historical-fiction and steampunk, and blend them into a mad cocktail. The strip is often dark and brooding, and my little A Christmas Carol-inspired story seemed to fit naturally into the storyline that was running in 2000AD at the time.

‘But why’, I hear you ask ‘have you done up another 2000AD-related strip when you constantly remind us, ON THIS VERY BLOG, that you absolutely hate writing fanfiction?’

Plain and simple: my goal is to write for 2000AD. I won’t call these scripts practice, but in a way they are; the finished strips are published in great 2000AD fanzines, read by lifelong fans of the magazine – even Tharg, the mighty alien editor of 2000AD has been known to glance in the direction of ‘zines like Dogbreath and Zarjaz now and then.

Sometimes a fanfiction comic catches the eyes of the strip’s original creators.

Shortly after the strip was posted on the 2000AD forum, Conor received an email from Defoe artist Leigh Gallagher which read:

'Dude...that is just...wow! That was such a great read! My hat's off to you both--I can't believe you put so much work into it!'

As if that wasn’t thrilling enough, Mr. Gallagher forwarded the strip to the Godfather of British Comics and Defoe creator Pat Mills, who had this to say about it in an email to Conor and me:

'Hi, Conor and Matthew, Just had a quick look at your advent Defoe - excellent story and excellent art. I was preparing to cringe and was pleasantly surprised. You've both really thought about the subject matter, the character and remained faithful to the original. That's impressive and appreciated.'

!!!

Being a writer of comics is a pretty shit job most of the time. Artists usually – and, as much as it pains me to say (ha ha) so, deservedly – get most of the attention. To receive a bit of praise from a writer whose work I’ve long admired was both humbling and a needed boost to keep me going during times when this whole writing lark feels like a hopeless endeavor. Mr. Mills probably didn’t realize the impact those few kind words had on me as a struggling writer – or maybe he did, and that’s why he took a moment out of his busy day to send that email.

Defoe: Spirits of Christmas can be read in its entirety on the Hibernia Comics (publisher of the great new 2000AD fanzine Tales From the Emerald Isle) blogspot, and hopefully by the end of this year the strip will find it’s way to the printed page!

Jikan Noon, Coming Soon...

2011-01-23T03:39:00.000-08:00

Jikan the Demon-Slayer is back! Every week, follow the adventures of the inter-dimensional demon-hunting ronin warrior on the Paragon Blogspot! This time, Jikan finds himself in the very wild Wild West - where harpy gunslingers, demindians, and planet-eating dearth worms run rampant! Jikan Noon, coming soon from Paragon!

If a few panels of demon-slaying a week isn't enough, there's no need to travel through time and space or hop through dimensions in search of more adventure - simply drop by the Paragon Blogspot and pick up some back issues or grab the Chronicles of Jikan (featuring Jikan and the Kappa King, along with Jikan: Witch Fires and Jikan: Cave of Death, and many more stories) at Lulu.com! And, if you missed out on Jikan's last weekly adventure, you can still read Jikan and the Kappa King here.

Be sure to check out Forbidden Planet's review of the Chronicles of Jikan.

A Brief Morphology of 2010...

2010-12-31T08:08:00.000-08:00

As I sit down to write out this blog entry, 2010 is close to its demise. I'm sitting here, alone, a few minutes before the Witching Hour. Wife's deployed in Afghanistan, so no kiss for me tonight. Kids are in bed, unable to make it to midnight. Bad horror movie is on, Demons 2 if you must know.

As much as I might try to avoid the fact that a 'New Year' is crashing down on me, I can't help but reflect a little bit on the year that is short in ending. Yeah, I could use this space to ramble on about personal thises and thatses - but really, why should I force you to pretend to care? - or I could spout out all the resolutions I won't bother to make therefore saving myself later regrets for not keeping to them.

No.

I'm going to cut to the chase and compile a list of comics and prose projects I've worked on this past year, point you to where you can buy them, or - for you cheap bastards - can read them for FREE. Enough of this blah-blah-blogging - here's that list:

Red Sands for Starscape Comics: A grim and violent sci-fi western, Red Sands is "Mad Max meets Strontium Dog meets the Dollars Trilogy". Cover by Alex Ronald, interior art by Bruce McLaren and letters by Bolt 01. Episode one is available for FREE via MyEbooks or Clickwheel. And I should mention that episode two is on its way in early 2011!

Rek Fen-Birn in Temple APA Issue 7: Rek Fen-Birn (with artist Antony Rothwell and letterer Bolt 01) is a four-page strip depicting a skirmish between several species of strange little creatures...where else can you find Beebeluns, Creeplings, Cactopillars and Rok-Shahs all in one strip (or anywhere else)? Temple APA issue 7 is FREE to read at MyEbooks or Clickwheel and will see print later in 2011 in Krazybov Comics!

Glubbleblugg, A Pleasing Symmetry and Third World/Fourth World in Something Wicked #6:

Glubbleblugg (with artist Conor Boyle and letterer Bolt 01) tells the tale of ‘an evil thing that lived under a rock…’ and that thing is Glubbleblugg, a vicious beastie with an appetite for children matched only by its rotten disposition.

In A Pleasing Symmetry (with artist Matt Soffe and letterer Jim Campbell) a man hunts the sinister creature that killed his wife – a creature that is ‘evil in its purest form, a being that feeds on the essence of others and in doing so postpones its own end'.

Lastly, Third World/Fourth World (also with artist Matt Soffe and letterer Jim Campbell) finds benevolent Martians arriving on Earth to deliver 'the secrets of the stars’...to a tribe of African headhunters

Order your copy of Something Wicked #6 at the FutureQuake Press website here.

A Monster Morality Tale in Space Squid Magazine #9: Monster kills, eats, kills, eats, learns a hard lesson. There may be a few print copies of Space Squid #9 left (contact the magazine to find out) but if not, you can view it online for FREE on the Space Squid website.

Little Yelena and the Golligugs in Back From the Depths' annual Hallowscream horror anthology: Little Yelena and the Golligugs (with artist El Chivo and letterer Bolt 01) is a short strip about the evil little creatures that deliver Night Terrors to children...view it for FREE via Clickwheel, Dropbox or MyEbooks - and look for it in print in a future issue of Krazybov Comics!

Muties on the Bounty in Tales From the Emerald Isle #0: In Muties on the Bounty (art and letters by Brigonos Mac Giolla Chomhgaill aka Professor Byah) a band of mutants stows away on a cargo ship bound for Emerald Isle in hopes of escaping the ongoing Mutant Persecution in Mega-City One; when one of the mutants kills the ship's crew, Judge Joyce is called in to hunt him down...order your copy of Tales From the Emerald Isle from Hibernia Comics.

Lugal in Temple APA issue 8: Lugal (with artist Louis Carter and letterer HdE) - a tale of terror and teleportation, aliens and alternate universes! This issue also features a small press write-up on Paragon Comics - here's your first look at my new ongoing series The Mekko-Sapiens Uprising! View Temple APA issue 8 for FREE via Clickwheel, Mediafire or MyEbooks.

An anthology comic couldn't hold him! Hacking his way out of the pages of Paragon Comics, the comic world's only inter-dimensional demon-hunting ronin has arrived in his own graphic novel - 'The Chronicles of Jikan'! Editor Davey Candlish has stitched together 99 pages - that's right 99 pages - of blood-drenched, gore-soaked demon-disembowling fury sure to have your bloodlust on the rise.

I've written three strips for the collection - Jikan: Witchfires (with artist Filip Roncone), Jikan: Cave of Death (with artist James Corcoran) and Jikan & the Kappa King (with artist Davey Candlish) - and several other writers and artists have contributed to the volume; visit the Paragon Blogspot for the entire lineup and art samples.

And click here to order your copy.

So it's midnight now, and 2010 is washed away by all you've had to drink tonight. No doubt you've kissed a girl or guy or two or both (wait, who am I kidding - most of my followers are comics nerds). Why don't you start your 2011 off right and read some comics? My comics.

Happy New Year. May yours be better than mine.

Muties on the Bounty: Last Words.

2010-12-23T14:42:00.000-08:00

'Muties on the Bounty' is a strip I'm very proud of, and I'm happy it seems to have gone down well with readers/reviewers so far; the first review of Tales of the Emerald Isle has been posted on the Everything Comes Back to 2000AD site and it's largely favorable:

Kerrin -

'A dark and moving work that extends the recent events surrounding Mega City 1 out into the wider world of Dredd. Matt McLaughlin does a fine job of weaving a tale of displacement and woe which echoes many current stories in our own reality. My only one gripe would be that I think some of the accent is a tad off but that’s probably more in the way I’m reading it. Bryan Coyle has done a lovely job on the artwork, brilliantly atmospheric exterior scenes and shadowy interiors. Great strip.'

Richard -

'FOUR PAGES! I’m re-reading this to write the review and can’t believe the story I remembered in my head from this was told in only four pages. A really nice little companion piece to the recent Dredd arc and packs a real emotional punch. Impressive stuff with suitably moody artwork.'

Also of interest, Pete Wells has posted Alan Nolan's step by step Tales of the Emerald Isle cover creation on his very cool 2000AD Covers Uncovered blog.

There are only a few copies of Tales From the Emerald Isle left - visit the Hibernia Comics site to order yours!

Hither Came Jikan, Inter-Dimensional, Demon-Hunting Ronin Warrior...

2010-12-21T03:19:00.000-08:00

And click here to order your copy.

Pulp(y) Sci-Fi in Templa APA Issue Eight...

2010-12-19T04:13:00.000-08:00

The eighth issue of Temple APA (cover above by Simon Mackie) is now online and can be downloaded - for FREE - at the Temple APA website, or at CLICKWHEEL and MEDIAFIRE, and can be viewed online at MYEBOOKS. So you've got plenty of options and no excuses not to read it.

In this issue you'll find my tale of terror and teleportation entitled 'Lugal', one of the weirdest-looking comic strips you'll ever bump into (thanks for that compliment Van Dom), and a small press feature on Paragon Comics and my upcoming series 'The Mekko-Sapiens Uprising'.

Mekko-Sapiens Press Release...

2010-12-19T03:02:00.000-08:00

Above is the official press release for my new (and first) on-going series, 'The Mekko-Sapiens Uprising', which kicks off in the next issue of Paragon Comics. Davey Candlish has drawn episode one, while James Corcoran is hard at work on episode two; I'm not sure if we're going to see and old-school ABC Warriors art jam in which every episode is rendered by a different artist, but the possibility is there...anyway, no need to go into great detail about the strip here because, well, that's what the press release is for!

Defoe: Spirits of Christmas...

2010-12-14T01:02:00.000-08:00

'Defoe: Spirits of Christmas' is a four-page comic strip artist Conor Boyle and I put together for this year's2000AD forum 'virtual advent calendar' (organized by fine fellow Pete Wells). Enjoy!

The Dead of Winter, or Zombicicles...

2010-12-08T07:10:00.000-08:00

Here's a sneaky peek at a comic strip artist Conor Boyle and I are currently collaborating on. Can't say anything about it yet, though. Not one thing, not even a hint, not even a hint of a hint.

Except that we'll reveal all in just five days, on December 13th. And that it's cooler than 'The Walking Dead', meaning something actually involving zombies happens before you read 'the end'.

Telling Some 'Tales From the Emerald Isle'...

2010-12-02T20:32:00.000-08:00

Some news I'm really excited about: the first issue of Tales From the Emerald Isle, a fanzine featuring Irish 2000AD characters and only Irish 2000AD characters, is now available to purchase from Hibernia Comics!

Beneath the fantastic Alan Nolan (above) cover you'll find the further adventures of Judge-Sergeant Joyce in 'Muties on the Bounty', a strip I collaborated on with artist Brigonos Mac Giolla Chomhgaill aka Professor Byah. Other characters on display are: Sinister/Dexter, Slough Feg, Maeve the Many-Armed and Harlem Heroes - so order the comic here, then grab a pint or twenty-eight, a plate of 'taters and help celebrate the (2000AD) Irish!

(let it be known I resisted placing the groan-worthy but obvious joke, 'When Irish Isles are Smiling' somewhere in this post - er, oh wait...damn)

Burning on the Flames of Witch Fires...

2010-11-26T07:49:00.000-08:00

View Blog

What exactly are the peasant-folk above burning on? I'm not certain, but I wish they'd share...

Well, where there's smoke, there's witch fire. 'Jikan: Witch Fires' is the third Jikan script I've written for Paragon Comics. Featuring everybody's favorite inter-dimensional demon-hunting Ronin, 'Witch Fires' has our hero flung from the time-space vortex and into a small English town terrorized by the sadistic Matthew Hopkins, Witchfinder General and Demon-in-Disguise.

Drawn by artist Filip Roncone, 'Witch Fires' is an epic 8-page sword fight which kicks into gear on the rooftop of a burning inn and climaxes amidst the swaying corpses decorating a gallows platform, and features spellbound peasants, reanimated corpses, spectral demons, lots of hacking and slashing, stabbing and gouging, and a whole bunch more violent-type action.

'Jikan: Witch Fires' will appear in an upcoming issue of Paragon Comics, as well as the Collected Jikan Volume 1 this Christmas, along with 'Jikan: Cave of Death' and 'Jikan and the Kappa King'.

Catching a Strontium Dogfish...

2010-11-13T07:48:00.000-08:00

'Catch of the Day' tells the story of Mukky Mud Flapper, the perfect character for a Redemption Story if there ever was one - problem is, Mukky's not interested in redemption.

Mukky's only interested in gunning down Strontium Dogs.

Years ago Mukky himself was a young up-and-coming Strontium Dog bounty hunter. But then he got old. Got mean. Got drunk. Got drunker. Killed a few innocent people and then killed a few more. Now he's got a whopper of a bounty on his head and every SD agent is after it - but for Mukky, that's like shooting dogfish in a barrel!

'Catch of the Day' will appear in a future issue of the super-cool Strontium Dog fanzine, Dogbreath. Artist Ryan S. Thomason designed the characters above (that's Mukky in the middle).

Madness of the God-Thing Lugal...

2010-11-07T14:56:00.000-08:00

'Feel the warp-fields wash over you. Breathe the electricity, listen to it crackle in your lungs. Allow your body to drift as its particles accelerate, separate. A pleasant sensation, soothing, like dreaming awake. Like dying in your sleep - only to be reborn!' - Sergeant Adelaide describing a 'Jaunt' to her newest combat team member.

Terror and teleportation: the horror of 'Lugal' begins with a frantic distress signal broadcast from a scientific research colony on an alien world. The message, cryptically warning of 'creatures that prey on unwary travelers to the Other Side', terminates in screaming. Immediately, an Intergalactic Expeditionary Corps combat team is sent to planet Gvakin to investigate the call - and discovers that the colony has been laid to waste and the colonists disappeared without a trace. Soon it is revealed that the colonists were the victims of a scientific experiment gone horribly right...

And the Madness of Lugal has been unleashed.

Artist Louis Carter has taken my script and created from it a wonderfully alien landscape full of weird beasties and strange characters (both human and inhuman). Nothing about planet Gvakin is familiar to human eyes: trees wriggle like tentacles, vines slither across the earth like worms, bizarre rock formations rise from the oozing jungle floor like spines.

Letters by HdE.

Next step - finding 'Lugal' a home in print. I'll be sure to update the blog when that happens. Update: 'Lugal' will appear in Temple APA #8.

Hallowscream! and Hallowscream Again!

2010-10-31T03:03:00.000-07:00

Looking for a fun way to kill, maim and torture a few hours of your night - really stick a knife in the gut and slowly twist it around? Yeah? Then you'll surely find yourself pleased that Back From the Depths' annual Hallowscream horror anthology is now available as a FREE download via Clickwheel or Dropbox, or viewable online at Myebooks! That's right, 84 blood-soaked pages sure to bring on the ultimate goregasm! Included in the collection is my eerie little tale, 'Little Yelena and the Golligugs' (art by El Chivo, letters by Bolt 01). Cover art by Andrew Milne.

Of course, if your carnal lusts aren't sated by a single serving of splatter 2009's issue (cover by Malcolm Kirk) is still available at Clickwheel or Myebooks, and features that little child-eating brute, 'Glubbleblugg'.

Almost 160 pages of FREE murder and mayhem? That's sharing the bloody love, that is!

Space Squid Magazine: Childish, But Not For Children...

2010-10-28T01:06:00.000-07:00

Space Squid Magazine has published stories by Bruce Sterling (father of cyberpunk), Chris Roberson (Clockwork Strorybook), Jay Lake (John W. Campbell Award winner), Jennifer Pelland (Nebula nominee)...and me?

Guess so. Yeah, they did. For some reason.

I won't ask why they've allowed a short story of mine, a Monster Morality Tale, to ooze its way across the pages of their 9th issue, but I can only laugh that a mag that's published Bruce Sterling has now published someone as unworthy as myself. Cue 'Big Stupid, Cheese-Eating Grin'.

The print version of Space Squid #9 is long gone, but the tentacled editors have generously posted the entire issue online as a FREE downloadable PDF. Check it out and get ready for a bizarre journey into the weirder dimension of sci-fi. Remember, Space Squid is childish but not for children.

Above is the cover for issue 9 (art/design by David Chang).

Something Wicked This Way Comes...

2010-10-04T01:23:00.001-07:00

The newest issue of FutureQuake Press’ annual horror comic anthology, Something Wicked, is now available! Issue #6 features an incredibly creepy cover by (favorite) artist Boo Cook, and a collection of stories that are sure to curl your toenails and scare the socks off your feet.

Somehow I’ve managed to sneak three strips into the magazine, past the usually vigilant eyes of editors Bolt 01 and Richmond Clements. Talk about the wardens looking the other way while the inmate runs amuck through the asylum!

Benevolent Martians arrive on Earth to deliver 'the secrets of the stars’ to a tribe of African headhunters in ‘Third World/Fourth World’ (art by Matt Soffe and letters by Jim Campbell). The one-page strip is presented in full glorious color on the magazine’s back cover!

In ‘A Pleasing Symmetry’ (co-story and art by Matt Soffe and letters by Jim Campbell) a man hunts the sinister creature that killed his wife – a creature that is ‘evil in its purest form, a being that feeds on the essence of others and in doing so postpones its own end'.

‘There was an evil thing that lived under a rock…’ and that thing is ‘Glubbleblugg’ (art and letters by Conor Boyle), a vicious beastie with an appetite for children matched only by its rotten disposition. ‘Glubbleblugg’ is a nasty little tale with an unexpected twist.

Order Something Wicked #6 – and FutureQuake #16 while you’re at it – at the FutureQuake Press website here.

There Be Muties on the Bounty...

2010-09-15T11:49:00.001-07:00

'Muties on the Bounty' is a short strip featuring Judge Joyce which will appear in the first issue of the 2000AD fanzine 'Tales From the Emerald Isle'.

I don't dabble much in fan-fiction (which seems almost funny to say at the moment, considering that in addition to 'Muties on the Bounty' I've recently had a Strontium Dog script commissioned by Dogbreath and find myself elbows-deep in a three-part Dreddworld script for Zarjaz) because a) I don't really feel comfortable writing characters others created and b) I have waaaaaaay too many ideas of my own - but when I had the opportunity to have a go at a Judge Joyce strip I couldn't say no. 'Why?' you ask (probably you didn't really ask 'Why?', but I'll tell you anyway).

You see, way back when and once upon a time, the little kid version of me wandered into a newspaper shop and picked up a comic called 2000AD. In it, Judge Dredd had to travel to Emerald City to investigate a crime - and found himself partnered with Judge Sergeant Joyce.

Judge Joyce immediately became my favorite character in the magazine. I liked his happy-go-lucky nature, his smile-in-the-face-of-death attitude and the fact that he was much more human - and therefore relatable - than Dredd. He laughed, he cracked jokes, he tipped the frosty mug during his shift; there was a lot of joy in Joyce.

So of course I went and ruined all of that.

'Muties on the Bounty' finds an older, more world-weary Judge Joyce. He's been beaten down by reality, killed one man too many, seen an awful lot of suffering. Fake smiles, hollow laughs; this isn't the Judge Joyce we remember.

When a group of mutants hijacks a ship sailing the Black Irish Sea, Joyce is the first Judge on the scene...and what he finds is not at all what he expected...the glimmer of humanity in a bunch sub-humans.

Brigonos Mac Giolla Chomhgaill aka Professor Byah is handling the art duties, and his work so far is stunning.

Krazy for Komics...

2010-09-08T14:19:00.001-07:00

Two short strips I've written will appear together in Krazybov Comics issue #9 (due out next year).

'Rek Fen-Birn' (above) features a variety of weird alien creatures - Beebeluns, Creeplings and Rok-Shahs - battling over a herd of Cactopillars. Tony Rothwell is the artist responsible for bringing these critters to the page, and Bolt 01 proclaimed 'let there be letters'.

In 'Little Yelena and the Golligugs' (below) more nasty beasties are on display: attended by her minions, the Golligug Queen secretes her Nightmare Juices for consumption. The mysteriously-monikered El Chivo scribbled the things only nightmares can produce, and again, Bolt 01 lent the strip his divine lettering touch.

Krazybov comics is an incredibly cool little magazine filled with off-the-wall strips and general weirdness. Check it out here.

A Pleasing 'Alterna-Vampire' Comic Strip...

2010-08-23T05:39:00.001-07:00

Ah, vampires.

Once stinking cadaverous creatures-of-the-night, vampires are now sparkly-skinned day-walking sex symbols. Once evil and cruel, they’re now mopey and brooding at best or sensitive and 'misunderstood' at worst.

So who’s afraid of vampires anymore? I want you to be afraid again. Artist Matt Soffe and letterer Jim Campbell want you to be afraid again.

'A Pleasing Symmetry' is our offering.

The comic strip is placed in the proper Victorian setting (I say proper because, well, nothing beats the atmosphere of a Victorian Vampire story) and features characters that could very well find themselves right at home within the pages of Dracula. Be comforted, fans of Traditional Vampire stories: here you’ll find overgrown graveyards and dimly-lit alleyways, carriage chases and isolated towns nestled in the Carpathian Mountains.

But...

While the strip might have dug its way out of the same graveyard that plotted other Traditional Vampire stories, it’s not exactly a Traditional Vampire story. And indeed though the strip’s skeleton is provided by the Traditional Vampire story, the flesh that clings to the bone is altogether something different…

The creature in ‘A Pleasing Symmetry’ is certainly vampiric, if not an actual vampire. It's a sort of 'unliving energy mist' that feeds on the vitality of its victims. ‘What manner of creature is this?’ asks an aged priest to whom our main character responds: ‘Evil, in its purest form.’

This creature was never a man. It never had a soul. And most importantly it has never moped or brooded, nor does it have sparkly skin or a sexy smile.

The proceedings in ‘A Pleasing Symmetry’ are grim and bloody, the finale unremittingly nihilistic. Matt Soffe’s beautifully atmospheric artwork creates a landscape stripped bare by fear, where every tree is twisted and every road leads to death.

‘A Pleasing Symmetry’ will appear in Something Wicked 6 this coming October. Be afraid, be very afraid.